Often, as I sleep I'm able to see the future, this is not surprising as I'm part Sioux and my ancestors conjured visions from ingesting multiple drugs and dehydrating themselves in sweat lodges....the following are my visions for 2010.
1) 2010, will be a magical year that will be marked by the return of "The MaXX." I'm not talking some bullshit comic book revival. What I'm talking about is an actual, giant purple, shredded homeless man with super powers. There are only two possible outcomes that can be drawn from this truth. First, he will most likely use his super powers only in the pursuit of seeking more alcohol, and 2nd he will fuck hot social workers....(if such a thing exists); furthermore, the MaXX will not bathe, as soap will render him powerless.
2) Frampton will come out of the closet.....yet still not get laid. I do not foresee this trend ending anytime within the next 12 years.
3) I will finally catch he who has been alluding me for 30 years.....Catfish Hunter, will be mine. Once I have captured this majestic fish I will perform an ancient Indian ritual in order to capture the creatures soul; much in a similar way as a "quickening" from the movie "Highlander." This ritual involves....cutting off the fish's head, as well as pulling his heart from his chest in order to eat it. I will use his blood as war paint, dance naked around a bonfire with a bottle
of cheap whiskey in one hand, a magic rock in the other, all while chanting the ritual song of victory just as my ancestors did......."NEEEEEWAA-FAAAA-TE-NEEEEEYAA-TATONKA-APPLEBOTTOMJEANSWAA-BOOTSWITHTHEFURYAA-THEWHOLECLUBWASLOOKING-AT-HER." Once this is completed I will have successfully captured the fish's being.There can be only one.
4) In late June of 2010, the Olympic committee will meet and decide a landmark ruling that all future Olympic games will not be played in a traditional format, but rather will be played on the wii instead.
5) and finally......Jim Flowers will still be a douche!
